Childhood Regrets

I’ve experienced a worrying trend as I’ve aged – a lot of movies I loved as a child were not only somewhat bad but also critically reviled. Did you know the Pagemaster, that movie with probably Macaulay Culkin turning into a cartoon and hanging out with anthropomorphic books, was a failure at both the box office and in the reviews? “Of course, that movie was awful,” you might say, or, if you’re like me, you’ll say instead, “What?! That’s crazy. I’ve seen that movie like three dozen times.”

Rat Race is one such movie. I refuse to look up anything about it because I know the past people of print will break my heart with their scathing hatred. I mean, I can guess so in that I remember the movie as cheesy, poorly paced, and American silly (rarely as artistically sound as British silly). John Cleese is in it, Mr. Bean is in it, and Seth Green’s there too, so you know it’s either going to be brilliant or more likely awful.

But I remember many nights in middle school, when perhaps I should have known better, having little better to do and putting Rat Race in for the millionth time. I don’t know. I think nostalgia functions from the same place familial love does, in that a person can be as shitty as possible, and some part of you will always love her just because they’re your ma.

Please tell me – is there anyone who remembers Rat Race fondly? Or Pagemaster? Not because they’re good, but because they were there for you night after night?

Jordan’ll post something later today, for all you Jordan fans.

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